Anonymity, Again

There’s a disadvantage to having grown up with the internet: every stupid thing one said when one was thirteen is up here forever.

And, despite whatever steps one took to be less traceable: never using your real name, never posting your city, etc. there’s always, always a temptation to have a linked identity. So if you use a username on Livejournal it might be tempting to use it on Deviantart and then, well, it’s practically a brand, so you might use it on Etsy, too. And then you do commissions or pay someone to do a commission for you and you use your paypal, which, a lot of the time, is going to have your name attached to it, because your money needs to at some point pass through something with your name attached.

So you yourself would have attached your real name in a long roundabout way to the things you posted on Livejournal lo, these many years ago.

And that’s not even bringing up Facebook. This afternoon, a friend told me she’d been being harassed by someone she met in a chat room. The harassment was happening on Facebook, but he’d blocked her after she told him she didn’t appreciate the threats, so she didn’t have access to his page anymore, which she kind of wanted to gather information to go to the police.

Google to the rescue! I have this guy’s name and the country he lives in. I was able to, in very short order, provide a decent picture (decent as in it fits most of the guidelines for ID photos), all of the biographical information he has online (including names and pictures of his parents and sibling), and links to his Facebook profile, Formspring, and Twitter accounts. The usernames on the Formspring and Twitter were not similar to his name, but he’d input his full name into the information anyway, so this was all in the first page of Google results.

Things he did on the internet, in cyberspace (which some people, including friends of mine, sometimes consider as less real than things which happen face to face), are going to result in criminal charges for this young man.

I can almost guarantee he didn’t expect this: if you block someone on Facebook, they’re supposed to be gone forever! But they’re not. Things which happen online are quite, quite real, and a number of us have some or all of our professional lives on the internet.

Anonymity or even approximations thereof can be detrimental to building a brand if one is trying to be a professional online. Anonymity can seem like a great bastion if one is trolling on the internet, and even the format itself can be seen as a buffer.

But anonymity is a very, very hard to attain and maintain. That’s why the creator of Cryptocat is being persecuted so very hard. Anonymity is vital for political agitation and protest under an oppressive regime, but there’s a natural tendency to want to slip up and have people you are speaking to acknowledge you as a person. When it’s trolls who are enabling me to hunt down all their information to neatly package for the cops, this is great. When it’s protesters who end up beaten and jailed for trying to change the world for the better, it is quite a bit less than great.

But the fact of the matter is that, unless one is taking extraordinary measures, you are not anonymous.

Putting my money where my mouth is

A couple weeks ago, I posted about pseudonyms.

I’ve been having conversations about them since then, particularly about using them for different genres. Genre boundaries have diminshed a great deal in the last few years – particularly the ‘rule’ saying a writer should stick to one genre. And with online book stores, if a reader only wants books in a particular genre, that’s what tags and categories are for.

Tags are of particular concern in a lot of the fanfiction I read – writers are expected to tag for major character death or spoilers for canon, and for level of explicitness, and for whether it contains romance, and the genders of the people involved if it does. Writers are also expected to tag for graphic depictions of violence, underage characters in sexual situations, and rape or non-consent: these are things built in to the platform of Archive Of Our Own, which is where I post my work. There is a little checklist when you start a new story that lets you just tick the box for anything that might apply.

The social aspect of the community also encourages tagging for drug use, mental health issues, suicide, abuse, dysfunctional families – you get the idea. Things which might be upsetting to read to the point that someone would choose to actively avoid them get tagged*. There is such strong community impetus towards tagging that an author who chose not to include a specific tag (because it would have spoiled the entire plot) has actually been vilified because of not tagging.

But this is fanfiction, so things you’d want to look for, like specific pairings or stories about specific characters, are also tagged for ease of searching. A lot of tagging is about finding the particular reading experience you are looking for.

There is some of this available in original fiction, though obviously not to the same extent. Categories, though, offer very concrete ways to separate what one writes into genres without using pseudonyms.

So that’s what I’m going to do. I have no particular shame attached to writing erotica – I write smart fiction, no matter the genre, and I want people to find me and want to buy my stories based on that. That’s why all of my fiction under 3000 words will end up on here at some point, and everything over 3000 words will go up on my Smashwords (with the exception of Intervention, out on Feedbooks for a couple years already, and future novels that might end up out on other channels).

*This is also known as trigger warnings. For example, someone who has been raped might not be able to read about rape without having unpleasant flashbacks or intense anxiety that would ruin their entire day. Avoiding stories with rape in them is a lot easier if they say what they are on the tin.

Blog fiction hiatus

You may have noticed the lack of fiction updates the past couple of weeks. Their lack is partly because doing any more of them will involve either more trawling through my ancient archives or writing new flash fiction. Writing new flash fiction is currently on hold because I’m nearing the end of a project I’ve been working on since roughly the spring of 2010, and am really excited to finish.

It’s also because I’m moving. In two weeks time I’ll be on a bus headed from Seattle to Minneapolis as the middle and longest leg of my trip from Victoria to Madison. I’m moving for a multitude of reasons, and aside from my own abhorrence of moving and lack of car, it’s been a fairly straightforward process: I’m still going to be doing webwork for the same bike store I work in now. The only thing that will change is no customers and I can work in my pajamas. I am going from living with my mom, where I’ve been staying since the end of my lease, to living with my best friend who is already doing things like unpacking the boxes I’ve mailed and crocheting me my very own blanket. My EMR license is viable for reciprocity, so I don’t need to take classes again, just do NREMT exams and local jurisprudence, all of which I can set up there.

Regular Wednesday blog posts will continue for the duration, as I have them scheduled pretty well in advance, so the only difference should be the lack of fiction posts. 

Whitewashing

I’ve long been of the school of thought that if you aren’t part of the solution, you’re part of the problem. As I read more about racism in science fiction, anti-racism, and whitewashing, I’ve come to a dilemma:

All of the central characters in my YA novel are white. Yeah, sure, one of them isn’t human, one of them is bisexual, one of the secondary characters is trans, I address mental health issues to some extent. I tried to actively include things that could be othering to young people and have those people affected by them kick ass. I was careful to have female characters retain their agency regardless of romantic attachment. I avoided the icky cultural narratives of romanticizing quasi-abusive relationships as best I could. I thought I was doing pretty well on showing a variety of people doing awesome things.

And then I realized that all of these characters were white. They’re from different socio-economic backgrounds and some are immigrants and there’s an age gap between people who would sociologically be considered the same generation, so I got to address a bunch of things I find interesting. I don’t think about race a lot, because I don’t have to: I am white. I also try to deal with people as individuals, and when they mention something race-related (delicious collard greens their grandmother makes, or parents having a hilarious Mumbai/Halifax accent), that gets tagged in my head as something related to their culture of origin, much in the same category as my parents being hippie journalists.

That’s one of the reasons one of my characters is Polish: I think the idea of ‘white culture’ is crap, because there are so very many different cultures. But I’ve been reading a lot about social justice in the past year (thank you, Tumblr, I think), and have been reminded that having heroes that look like you is really, really important. Belle was my favourite Disney Princess because she looked the most like me (and also because I have an absurd weakness for that fairy tale).

So it kind of sucks that all of these characters are white. I didn’t set out to write a perfectly politically correct novel. But I kind of want to rewrite it so that one of my characters (the all-American football star) is African-American. So I am dithering.

Another part of the argument is that I don’t want him to be token, I don’t want him to be ‘just’ inclusion of people of colour. Additionally, I’d kind of envisioned him as an American mish-mash: part Ojibwe, part French, lots of German, some Lakota, some English, a fair portion of we’re-not-really-sure. Tanned and tall, but not particularly easily pinpointed in terms of subculture of origin. But he’d still read as white, so that would make him not particularly perfect as the All-American Hero.

There’s also the really tempting part that, if I’m not changing him, the book is ready to go. I started on this four years ago, so being done is a really, really tempting thought.

Alpha Males

Romance novels and pickup artists have something in common:

They both tend to simplify complex sociological forces about attraction and mate fitness into really easy sets (I’m sorry, A Beka, for the upsetting theories). The most common sets are ‘alpha males’ and all other men. What are alpha males? Well, depends who you ask. Pickup artists think one thing, romance novel enthusiasts think others, but the term comes from ethology. It is not a concept that is historically or anthropologically relevant to humans, but it is easy shorthand.

What’s it shorthand for, though?

Well, judging from what I know of the protagonists of this list, mostly it’s shorthand for white (American, Russian, or English, for preference), tall, confident, securely employed, intelligent, physically competent, and handsome. Oh! Also able-bodied and with no crippling mental illness. Alpha male is just a much shorter term, and less problematic to say in public.

The term also connotes leadership, and speaks to people’s desire for clear hierarchy as opposed to the complicated morass of actual human interaction. Werewolf romance novels are probably the most explicit in this. They break everything down so the reader gets both clear hierarchy and clear happily ever after, because simple and straightforward and forever is in dire short supply.

Hashtags

Trillian is one of the few programs I have constantly running on my computer. Partly because it allows me to keep most of my IMing in one program (I got sick of the ‘what is beeping what the hell is beeping oh wow I have no idea what’s beeping, guess I’m not talking to anyone’ dance), but also because it is a great way to passively follow Twitter.

If any of you follow me on Twitter, you know that I do not engage a whole lot there. I post things! Every few days or so. I have occasional, usually short conversations with friends like Kim Nayyer and Suzanne. A large part of that is that most of my writing support system is to be had over more private channels, like a forum or IMs. I find it easy to forget that social media and getting a bunch of people to read your writing involves things like making sure people know you exist.

Even so, I follow a few hashtags. Hashtags, for anyone who has been assiduously avoiding Twitter for the last few years, are ways to mark that a tweet is about a certain topic. Sometimes hashtags will trend, becoming popular with a large number of people for a while. Right now, a trending hashtag is #removeoneletterfilms. The hashtags that I regularly follow are #yyj, for events and news in Victoria, #myWANA, for the author support network Kristen Lamb started, and #amwriting, because it seemed like a good idea at the time. Both of the latter I follow at least in part to see emergent memes in the kind of indie writer culture that uses hashtags on Twitter, because they are sometimes also memes I will see at least partly reflected in news articles or brought up at meetings of the Victoria Writers’ Society.

With Trillian, any tweets that include those hashtags pop up in the bottom right part of my screen. I can glance over and read and glance back and then it fades away. If I feel it necessary, I can reply to or retweet the tweet in question without ever switching tabs.

The curious thing about hashtags like myWANA and amwriting is that I see some people using them to market their books.

This is interesting to me, because yes, of course, writers read, but these hashtags seem to be only peopled by writers. I’d think that marketing could be more effectively directed at readers who are not already writers themselves: your writing support network probably already knows all about your book.

Meta: Snowglare

This is undoubtedly one of the cruelest things I’ve ever written.

I wrote it in the summer of 2011, and, like so many things, it was for Adam’s contest. The prompt was parody, so I wrote a parody of a person.

She’s since become a friend, but at the time I was having a lot of difficulty connecting with her. She’d initially taken critique very badly, and then become reliant on getting critique (mostly from me or another friend of mine) before turning in, and hadn’t had a particularly good English education (which is something I shouldn’t hold against people, but tend to in writing-oriented settings). She’d also written a story with me as a character in it, with particular attention to my bosom. I was neither pleased nor comfortable with this. Since then, she’s grown in leaps and bounds, and joined me in the semi-finals this year, as well as being published several times over the course of the year. She and I have also talked a lot more.

Her username is The Solarized Night, which gave root to a lot of the imagery: the Northern Lights, the Aurora Borealis, are the result of solar flares, and are most visible at night.

Luminosity is a term for self-awareness.

She lives in the Southern hemisphere, while I and Adam live in the Northern hemisphere.

With that knowledge, everything else about the poem kind of falls into place: from vague imagery about long nights and the Northern Lights to excoriation of someone I did not consider as acting rationally or particularly intelligently and considered attention-seeking.

What’s worse is that she liked the poem, but did not understand the meaning (I will probably link her this post).

Also I got a perfect score for this, the only one I’ve ever gotten. It is the reason I’m one of five people in the Hall of Perfection, and it can also be read here.

In sum: cruel and petty idea, well-executed.

Poem: Snowglare

Aurora’d e’entide
–as close to dark as it gets this far north–
any perceived brightness a mere matter of snowglare
light-starved crystals glittering with all their might
that the dim shimmer might pass for luminosity
and draw all attention

Editing published works

This was going to be a completely different post. One of the pitfalls of being friends with a number of writers and reading all of their stuff behind the scenes (primarily in Google Docs) is that I lose track of what they’ve actually published. A friend was talking about how she’s heavily editing one of her novels, and I was annoyed  with her because I thought it was the one she’d already put out. Whoops, no, it’s the one slated for later this year.

But back to my annoyance.

Editing works that are already out is something that happens. We see it most commonly with comics, where collected volumes will have extras: these are mostly to get you to buy the same material again, plus bonus sketch or story or worldbuilding. This is established practice, which is evident particularly in popular series such as The Sandman, which has the individual issues, the collected editions, the absolute editions, and the annotated editions. One gets something new and slightly different out of each edition. One needs to buy the whole series four times to get that full experience.

It is also fairly established practice in textbooks, where new information requires rewrites.

But in novels, there have traditionally been few differences between editions: some will have particular illustrations, some will not, and the page count may vary between the hardcover and the pocketbook, but it is essentially the same content. In the case of Good Omens, by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, there are two cover variants, but the contents remain the same. The cover variants are entertaining when next to each other (all of my copies have been of the black cover: my best friend has one with the white cover), but the contents are the same.

Take, for example, American Gods (yes, it is apparently Neil Gaiman day on Author’s Refuge). It recently had a tenth anniversary edition! The tenth anniversary edition has an additional twenty thousand words on the original. Twenty thousand. It is also the author’s preferred text.

I find this maddening, as it’s a larger echo of something I see a lot in indie publishing. I need to buy it again to get the whole experience – to get the experience the author wants me to have, even. This is okay for me with American Gods, as my paperback has gone missing somewhere in the last two countries, and I adore the story.

In indie publishing, I’ve seen a few authors scrambling to fix typos or plot holes pointed out by first readers – meaning that people who buy the book on the first, second, and third days are generally all buying slightly different books. This is amateurish, and frankly quite terrible: your book should be the best it can be before you publish it. Often, the best it can be requires an editor.

I am firmly of the opinion that, when you learn something new about writing, something that changes the way you write, it is the better part of valor to take that and apply it to something new instead of re-writing something old. Produce new and better things and send them forth into the world, and then produce more that are even better.

But I’m caught – it’s been ten years, and it’s twenty thousand words. It’s a celebration, not a cover-up. I may end up buying the hardcover.

Meta: Crazy Fairies

So, on Google Drive, in my Writing folder, I have a sub-folder labeled Shorts that has a sub-folder labeled Old.

That’s where this is from. It was written in the winter of 2007 or 2008: I’m not sure which. I only uploaded everything to Google Docs in 2010, because I didn’t want to lose all of the writing I’d done for the writing group I was part of in high school.

So this is how far I’ve come as a writer in the last five years, and contrasts with last week when I posted something just barely finished. It’s also an experiment in how far I’ve come as a person able to objectively critique my own work and not just go hide under a rock.

Apparently this was based on a dream I had. Oh! And I think it was around New Year’s in 2008, as I drew this:

Apparently these are the characters?
later in January 2008.
So, since it’s been so long, we’ll do the first run the way I do first runs on most things: caustically.
I am not sure why I am all dismissive of homelessness except that the perspective character is a sociopath. Also dead bodies under plants are kind of a Japanese thing and I was going for Irish.
In the second section, the second sentence is telling rather than showing and could be tightened. I’m not sure if inconsistent capitalization of Garda was meant to be a character thing or is just a consistency fail.
No idea why it’s so painfully pseudo-British except I think part of the prompt was that I had to include the word ‘chesterfield.’
Lots and lots of telling.
Abrupt shifts! Also telling. Also run-on sentences.
The line about bestiality, and that whole scene, are really awkward. I still find it hard to write those awkward transitions from revelation to calm discussion to acceptance, but fainting is no longer something I tend to use to avoid those transitions.
I don’t think they even read the Glob and Snail in Dublin. I have no idea why I included it.
I think I was trying to do a thing about speech bubbles and fairies seeing all spoken language as speech bubbles, but I don’t think that came across very well, and has no time to sink in before it’s over. Synesthesia is something that interests me, partly because a friend of mine has it with music. Magical synesthesia seemed like the doubleplusgood version of it.
In conclusion: interesting idea, poorly executed.